I’ve battled with anxiety most of my life. It is a product of my childhood, but also a gateway into my spiritual connectivity. As I grow into my spiritual practice I believe this anxiety must be dealt with naturally. Finding productive ways to transform the energy into something useful both for me and the world is necessary. This involves digging deep and experiencing the fears and trauma that may have triggered the anxiety in the first place.
Can we transform our pasts into something useful for us? I believe so. Life is all about how and where we place our energy. Thoughts, feelings and beliefs are planting seeds that can manifest. Even not physically doing or saying anything can still create an outcome. Life is about choosing to focus on what serves us and others best, almost on a subatomic level. Taking thoughts, beliefs or feelings we have understood and acknowledged not to be beneficial and transforming them is ultimate the path of magick. It’s like a spiritual immune system. As I continue to venture into these dark parts of myself and treating them with love the stronger my spiritual practice becomes.
Our darkness is not something to feared but to be explored. Darkness is the part of ourselves we have ceased to give energy. It’s devoid of life and suppressed in our subconscious. In the world there is energy and places devoid of energy – the basic yin and yang aspects of our world. We exist in the space between.
Facing these ‘monsters’ helps us realise there is a place for them in our world. While doing so I have spent some time meditating over the Devil card in the tarot. The Devil, along with other ‘scary’ manifestations of our collective imagination, is representative of ‘the other.’ The parts of ourselves and society that don’t belong and are misunderstood. Its design is a subversion of the Lovers tarot card which is indicative of positive creation and attraction. The two figures in both cards are similar, except in the Devil’s image they are in chains. These chains however are self-imposed. They can be taken off with ease and are not tightly bound to the figures.
We can chose to imprison ourselves with these subverted beliefs that have manifested in ourselves and our collective consciousness. We can continue to think that the devil is out to get us and misunderstand the motivation that comes from our deepest desires. Or, we can treat it with care, like a wild beast that has been suppressed and left without nurturing for years, (even centuries). Allowing so will help us to transform these fears, anxieties, frustrations and dangers into things that serve us all.